Relax First, Work Later!

Wait, what? Wasn’t I writing about procrastination last month?

In the USA and other Western cultures, we’re socialized to “earn” our play time, so why would we even consider relaxing before getting work done? 

First off, the suggestion I’m making today is not for everyone. It was not for me earlier in my life, because I lacked self-discipline when it came to my personal chores and tasks. I needed my commitment to others to get things done, and I needed to get them done early in the day. If it’s your situation, you might want to stick to a more strict discipline.

However when we’re already self-disciplined and productive, we can actually become addicted to our to-do lists, which can lead to overwhelm and/or a lack of rest and relaxation. Some people actually use accomplishing tasks as a way to cope with their feelings and avoid a sense of boredom. Nothing wrong with that, but this can still prevent real rest or at least a sense of spaciousness in our days. To the extreme, this can lead to burnout, as tasks are never-ending.

At some point in my life, I found myself so intent on doing my tasks first and postponing my relaxation to later in the day that I would not get any fun time at all, even on weekends. I would find myself at 7pm thinking “oh well, I still have time to cross two more items off my list”. And suddenly it’s my bedtime and I had not taken any time for true relaxation and fun. This led to frustration, yet it was totally self-inflicted.

Tasks, chores, and work have a way of expanding and filling all the gaps. It’s mind-boggling. Ask someone who is not employed or retired, and they will tell you how their errands and household tasks fill their whole days. If you are retired, it’s not a big deal, and age can also be a factor, but if you’re still in your active years, it’s not a good thing because it can make you either inefficient, or exhausted, or both.

In the last few months, I decided to switch things up on my weekends and make time for relaxation and fun first thing in the day. After getting up, I would linger on the couch with a book, go for a hike, and/or watch a movie with my husband. The laundry might have run during the movie, but otherwise I would start my Saturday or Sunday tasks later in the afternoon. 

And it worked! The relaxing time did happen! And because I was committed to accomplishing a few tasks before the end of the weekend, they still got done on time. By the way, the same goes for my workday mornings - by getting up early enough, there is enough time for something fun before starting with work.

So if you’re efficient and productive, and also overwhelmed or lacking relaxation, may I suggest you ask yourselves some questions? Would you be using activity as a coping mechanism? Would you be resisting rest and doing nothing? Perhaps making some changes in your way of living could get you to a win-win situation - being both productive and also well-rested and in balance. Simplifying and choosing good enough will be the key to finding a sustainable equilibrium, promoting greater well-being and more joy in your life. And frankly, also being more pleasant to be around for your partner, children, and friends.

For some people, relaxing first and working later is worth considering. Try it out!